DoppelGifter · Fine Commemorative Goods
The Atelier · Staff Directory · Headcount: 1

Meet the team.
All of him.

DoppelGifter is proudly powered by six dedicated professionals who share a vision, a work ethic, and — on closer inspection — a face.

We put one man's likeness on everything. It started with the org chart.

Renaissance oil painting of Matthew as a smug noble founder holding a mug printed with his own face
Matthew Miller · Founder & Chief Doppelgänger

Had one good idea and immediately put his face on it. Refers to the mirror as "the board." The board approves everything.

Renaissance painting of Matthew as a court painter at an easel, painting a portrait of himself
Matteo di Millero · Court Painter

Classically trained (watched a documentary). Every portrait he paints comes out looking suspiciously like the founder. Nobody has raised this.

Renaissance painting of Matthew in noble dress sealing a cardboard shipping box with a tape gun
Matt "Two-Day" Miller · Head of Fulfillment

Personally escorts every parcel to the post office like a royal procession. The tape gun has a name. The name is also Matthew.

Renaissance painting of Matthew as a courtier wearing a modern call-center headset over a ruff collar
M. Miller, Esq. · Customer Happiness

Answers every email within the hour, largely because he is also the one who caused the problem. Has never once escalated a ticket. To whom?

Renaissance painting of Matthew as a stern guild inspector examining a mug through a magnifying glass
Matthieu LeMiller · Guild Inspector, Quality

Holds every mug to the light and asks, "Is the face crisp?" Rejection rate: brutal. Conflict of interest: enormous. The face is his.

Renaissance painting of Matthew as a treasurer writing in an enormous leather ledger by candlelight
Matthew of Antwerp · Keeper of the Ledger

Records every render, every farthing, every mug in an ancient ledger (it is a CSV). Approves all expenses after a stern discussion with himself.

A note on our org chart

Every arrow points to the same man. HR describes the culture as "unanimous." The annual company retreat is a table for one, and attendance is always 100%.

Payroll, mercifully, is simple.

Put someone else's face on stuff →